Friday, February 19, 2010

Ryan Watches a Motion Picture #9: Under Siege (1992)


The greatest of the Seagal movies, and one of my favourite ridiculous early 90s action films. If you're looking for something to get excited about with friends and laugh as Seagal's clunkily powerful body breaks limbs and deflects knife blows, look no further.

Seagal plays this ship's cook called Ryback that is also a disillusioned Navy Seal. When another disillusioned military-type and his forces take over the ship he's cooking on, he must hurt them all in a great many ways. And he does. The final battle finishes off with Tommy Lee Jones getting a thumb through his right eye, getting a kitchen knife plunged into the top of his head, and getting his upper body rammed into a computer monitor and electrocuted. All in the span of about 5 seconds. It's like a Mortal Kombat finisher.

It's just starting to show its age, what with its Gulf-war talk, Bush Sr. appearance, and melodramatic soundtrack. Aged action movies are the best action movies. It also has ex-Baywatch playboy playmate Erika Eleniak getting a bit naked.

So: A wine pairing suggestion - cheap and red. Like the lifeblood of Seagal's enemies.

1 comment:

madkevin said...

"So who are you? Are you, you, like, some special forces guy or something?"

"Nah. I'm just the cook."